always not good enough

i saw all of my grades..
the subjects i expected to have a good grade turned out to be the exact opposite.. i aimed to have good grades this sem.. i tried to study ahead and make sure i didn't have a failing exam.. but what i got in return was something i think i don't deserve.. the last 2 semesters i didn't study that well and i had failing exams.. but i had good grades still.. bakit yata baliktad? what would that suppose to mean? now i am feeling that i am not good enough.. all the time.. i was always not good enough.. DAMN!! what did i do wrong?! in all aspects of my life when i try hard, really hard i am always not enough.. not good enough.. not good enough at school, as home, as a person, or even i think as a friend.

i think for some people even if how much you give everything you are still not good enough.. i feel bad about my best friend.. what happened to her after she gave everything to the guy she loves.. cheesy huh? sad but true.. people judge you by the past mistakes you make.. by the wrong decisions you made from the past.. PAST IS PAST as everyone would say.. how much you would want to leave the past behind people will just let it dwell it to you.. by judging you by leaving you because you messed up..

people are just born to be self-righteous.. i hate them.. i hate people..

and we are? aliens.. i hope.. aliens who do make mistakes.. aliens who after being so down picks themselves up.. aliens who are not self righteous and who are considerate to other aliens who make similar or even a whole different mistakes in their lives..

i hate people.. they are just people yet they love to play God..

:(