time pass by so fast

it's already the third month of the year.

how time flies!!

gaaahd. and i have so many realizations.

last year i ended up with a great deal of a heart ache. (yeah it sucks)

and this year i think God is giving me signs that i don't have to worry no more and i have to just trust Him.

earlier this year i got a call from the tutoring center i applied for last year and suddenly offered me a job.

and since i have been receiving many students and earning at least some extra money.

and then i was asked to represent my college department in this sing and dance competition.

and it was my very first time after 3 years in college to sing and dance in front of a huge crowd!

every one i know was really shocked and didn't really expect to have that kind of talent ( i would say guts. hahaha!)

but guess what? we won! my very first time to perform and it went well and we won.

next is i was asked to run as board member in our college executive council. i was really scared since the last time i ran for something was when i was in elementary and i didn't have a rival at that time. but still i accepted the challenge.

after a looong wait, and after the tallying of votes, i got the good news. I WON.

first time participating in something like this and i actually got positive results and feedbacks!

and i couldn't help but wonder what i did to deserve all these achievements.

and also lately after taking my exams, i feel confident that i would pass it. it's really quite weird since i feel so many positive energies come to me. so many good luck.

and then i realized, i had failed so many times last year.

lost a loved one, at some point lost myself, and failed to prove everybody wrong.

now i have made new friends, gained somethings for myself and created new dreams. (of course that would include to buy some things for myself and being a full time athlete:))

and i thought something is still missing.

LOVE LIFE.

hahahahaha!

come to think about it, it's true.

i have a stable job, my school life is stable too and good, i met new people and started to go out of my shell.

the only thing lacking is someone special.

but then i thought, maybe God never intend to give me that someone just yet.

since i was in a relationship for the past 2 years.

i think God is giving me the opportunities to regain myself and confidence and to put me out into the world.

and because of ll these achievements, i realized, it can wait.

I CAN WAIT.

maybe i can enjoy singlehood for a little longer. :)

now i can attest to the saying that when God gives away something he is emptying your hands for something better.

now i can see everything clearly and also in a different perspective. :)

i hope those people who have gone through and who are still going through a big deal of pain and loss would not give up and lose hope.

i had my own moments of giving up.

i had my own suicidal moments.

but when i see all the things God has given me, i changed the way i see myself and the way i see the things around me.

it may not be easy.

but you just have to open your eyes a little wider.

sometimes it's not in the things we want to see.

it's in the things we need to see.

i hope people would realize that.

have a great day ahead!

not sure if i'm ready for summer but i'm looking forward to it!

xoxo :) ♥

pamie. :)